RELAX!!!

I was stressed this week!  Like, stressed!  ...  Er, the Editorial Board here at Raccoon Inc. was stressed!  There were two massively important jobs to do at work this week and both (BOTH!) went to pot.  Obscenities were scattered, office supplies were launched, desks were fist-pounded, and a slow walk through the rain was had to cool off.  So, I rattled through the end of the day and got home and figured that this week I'm going to write a little bit about the fine art of relaxation.  And then tonight I get here and my coworkers are stressed, too!  So calm down everyone, chill, and hang out with me a while as we go on a tranquil trip this evening.


BOB & RAY

Yep.  They're up to no good.

Well, laughter is the best medicine, of course - and for stress, too!  How about this?  Have you heard this one this before?  Bob Elliot (the comedian, not the sports writer, of course) and Ray Goulding, were a brilliant old American comedy duo (similar to Wayne and Schuster here in Canada... only... you know... funny).  I say "were" because Ray passed away twenty-two years ago, though Bob's still going strong.  Nevertheless, they worked together magnificently, and in their sketch "The Slow Talkers Of America", they put on a clinic in comic timing.  If you don't at least snicker at this one, you need some serious de-stressing.  Or maybe just a different form of medication.  Let's see here...


WASH YOUR FACE IN MY SINK

Well, I'm still talking about them, so... yeah the legacy continues.

Let's try something a little different.  Maybe you just need something a little goofy and weird.  Remember the 90's?  Yeah, the 90's?  I acknowledge, some of you might be a little young for that, but for those who aren't, think back.  Do you remember the Dream Warriors?  If you do, awesome, cause I sure don't.  They are Canadian though, and were nominated for four (count em, four!) Junos, winning one in 1992 for Best Rap Recording of the Year.  Not too shabby!  Take that, Organized Rhyme!  Their first ever nomination came in the same category for this here song, "Wash Your Face In My Sink".  I... think it's a metaphor, but the video shows it quite literally, so....  I guess it's a metaphor that... works literally too?  I dunno.  Anyway, it's catchy, the video's quirky as hell (dude has a jacket that says "Sucker MC" written on the back!  That's AWESOME!)  and reminds me vaguely of Deee-Lite's "Groove Is In The Heart" for some reason if she, you know, was arrested and thrown in jail for a noise violation for wearing those outfits.


IDIOLOGY

It's cool cause you could open up the case and look through it like a knob!

How about something even more left-field?  You like IDM, right?  I know!  Who doesn't?  Intelligent Dance Music, for the uninitiated.  It's a sort of a junk drawer genre of music.  Ambient, electronica, techno, experimental...  It kinda makes me think of folk music.  Folk music can be bluegrass, rock, country, gospel - but whenever you hear folk music, you can tell right away by listening that that's what it is.  I'd say the same is true for IDM.  It's one of those genres, like folk, where you'll know it when you hear it.  So here's a neat little album.  Idiology by the german group Mouse on Mars was released in the spring of 2001.  Pitchfork.com, who I respect, gave the album a 9.6/10, and the album was placed in the top 20 for 2001 up in the same lofty echelon as Radiohead, The White Stripes, and other, you know, good bands.  Have a whirl listening to the track "Subsequence".  In fact, check out the whole album.  It's one of those albums that makes it hard for you to remain stressed as it marches on.  And yes, Virginia, the laptop is a musical instrument!


THE RAINDROP PRELUDE

Sweet summer rain.  Like God's own mercy.

Maybe mellow is a better idea.  A funny thing happened to me on the way to the bank recently.  It's been raining here on and off all week, and now all weekend as the weatherman advises me.  Most days this week, the rain would come suddenly down in heavy sheets, then just as suddenly stop, so it was noteworthy that as I walked from the car to the bank we were experiencing light rain for a change.  It was noon hour, but nonetheless still dark and gloomy, but the sprinkling rain was a rather nice change and it made me think of something.  This piece of music here, Chopin's Raindrops Prelude.  Formally known as Prelude, Op. 28, No. 15, it is the longest of Chopin's preludes and was composed during a medical stay in Majorca.  One days it was pouring rain and the sound of the raindrops on the roof gave him the inspiration for the composition.  Sometimes soft and light, sometimes dark and gloomy, the song is a calm, dark, rainy day in the mind, though it may be clear as a bell outside.


THE BIG SNIT

What time is it?  Well, it's time for...  SAWING FOR TEENS!!!

Well, if you're steamed, one surefire way of cooling off is to watch someone even angrier than you are.  Not just angry, either, but absurdly angry.  That's exactly what you get when you watch the CNIB classic "The Big Snit".  If you've never seen it before, go ahead and watch it.  If you have seen it before, watch it again.  If you're stressed, take a look.  Not only is it hilarious, but it's also touching.  It should speak to all of us that our day-to-day problems are really not all that great and that all we really need is a dose of perspective.  All of a sudden things really aren't all that bad anymore.  It's true!


NORWEGIAN WOOD

Ah, the trademark scowl.  Legendary.

And sometimes what you need when you're super-stressed is a jolt to the system to reset yourself, letting all that stress just drain out of you.  Now here's a great example.  Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown) was yet another McCartney/Lennon production, but because of it's melody, musical structure, and chord progression, it lent itself well to jazz interpretations.  Everyone from Count Basie to Buddy Shank was taking Beatles songs and jazzifying them, but there's this one version of the song right here that I'd like to draw your attention to.  If there's one jazz musician that could take the little volume dial and crank it up to 11, it was the one and only Buddy Rich.  He took this mild-mannered, sitar-rific Beatles song off Rubber Soul and turned into this massive, screaming, yet textured wall of sound.  To give you an idea of just how massive this is, you can make out Buddy in the background of this intense waltz - and Buddy wasn't a 'background', 'team player' kinda guy, either.  This oughtta snap you out of it.



BLOODY WELL RIGHT

Man.  You can make stars into any kind of constellation you want, can't you?

And sometimes all you really need is a good smack upside the head.  If you're frustrated and stuck on something that won't let you go, mentally, take some advice from Supertramp.  Right.  You're right.  Sure you are.  Now shut the hell up.  Who cares?  Who cares?  That's the real question.  You know it reminds me of the Norm Peterson rule my Psychology 100 professor taught me.  Remember Norm Peterson from Cheers?  As portrayed by George Wendt?  Well, anyway, the only thing that he was concerned with in his world was the price of beer.  Are we going to war with Syria?  I dunno.  Does it affect the price of beer?  No?  Then I don't care.  It's kind of a cut-throat method of stress relief, but if you pick, say, three things in your life that you really, really care about, focus on them, and consider everything else in life accidental to those three things, you'll probably find your stress level drop way, way down. 


So, thank you Supertramp, and George.  Bob and Ray, as well.  Chopin.  Mouse on Mars.  Uh... Saw Guy...  The Dream Warriors.  Oh and last but not least, the, uh, downright cuddly Buddy Rich.  Thank you again for tuning in this week - and remember: relax.  Life's too short to get hung up on the little things.  Good night!