Strange Things

Good evening.  Now let's cut the jibba jabba and get right straight down to business.  The name of the game tonight is Strange Things.  Very strange things.  So, without any further ado, onward we go!


SUN RA

Is that chain mail on your head or are you just happy to see me?

And tonight's opening bid is one Sun Ra (born Herman Poole Blount).  This gentleman on top of being an acclaimed Avant-Garde jazz musician, was also a very strange man.

Far out, man.

How strange?  Well!  In 1937 he said:

"… my whole body changed into something else. I could see through myself. And I went up … I wasn't in human form … I landed on a planet that I identified as Saturn … they teleported me and I was down on [a] stage with them. They wanted to talk with me. They had one little antenna on each ear. A little antenna over each eye. They talked to me. They told me to stop [attending college] because there was going to be great trouble in schools … the world was going into complete chaos … I would speak [through music], and the world would listen. That's what they told me."

George Clinton ain't got shit on me!

Well, you know, Van Gogh actually had a similar sort of story where he grew up a missionary and took up painting relatively late in life as a way to connect with God.

Dude...  I wish.

On top of being a swinging cool jazz musician, he was also a philosopher of sorts, speaking and writing Kaballah to Koans, Free Masonry to the Black Power movement. 

Before there was Jak and Daxter...

And if you really wanna see something far out, check out the movie he did, "Space is the Place".  Man, is it a trip.


THE BLOBFISH

Yes, this is an actual thing, and this is actually what it looks like.

This is a Blobfish, a fish-like creature that lives off the coast of Australia.  It lives in deep-sea areas and gets around more by being slightly more buoyant than water, rather than by a more traditional muscular or ballast system.  For food, it swallows edible floating things that are directly in front of it.  Nice!  Not nice, though, is how this poor, lamentable creature is facing extinction due to deep-sea trawling in the creature's only natural habitat.  Aww...  The sea can be a cruel place, but then again, so can the internet.

Dr. Blob-il

Stupid Hat Blob



Well-to-do Blob



And the most tragic of all, Ringo Blob.

WHITE NINJA

White Ninja is a comic by Scott Bevan and Kent Earle, two fine gentlemen like myself from the great province of Saskatchewan.  And it's about a ninja dressed in white - hence, White Ninja.  So what is White Ninja?  I'll let them explain.

"White Ninja Comics are not for the weak of mind. They are a brilliant satirical commentary on controversial worldly issues.

They can be enjoyed on many levels. Scholars, Philosophers, and the like, who possess the intellect to analyze and break down the comics to their hidden, and often devious, roots, will enjoy White Ninja to its fullest degree. Others, like you and I, however, can still enjoy the comics for their light-hearted surface humour and funny drawings."

Sounds deep, huh?  Well, here are a few shining examples.  I'll let you be the judge.

PETE ROSE

It's a bird!  It's a plane!  It's..!  It's...!  It's a Rose!

I always say, you'd have to be a little strange to want to be the best.  Well, Pete Rose was the best.  A career batting average of .303 and #1 on the All-Time hits list with 4,256.  There are lots more records and statistics that he took a wrecking ball to, but we're here for weird, not great.  When walked at the plate, he sprinted to first base.  I mean, who does that?  That puts him on the weird list (and earned him the name "Charlie Hustle" from Whitey Ford) right then and there.

I love how the catcher's mask is just sort of hanging in the air to the left there.  What an action shot.

Oh yeah, and then there's this.  During the 1970 All-Star game, Rose kinda sorta ran over the opposing catcher Ray Fosse, kinda sorta separating his shoulder and Fosse's career was kinda sorta never the same again.  I mean, this is an All-Star game.  If you look at the Pro Bowl, that might as well be flag football, and there's hardly any hitting whatsoever in the NHL All-Star game.  It's not like the game really meant anything, at least back then.  But Pete Rose played for keeps, every time, all the time.  Even during exhibition games as demonstrated above.

It's like a cross between Alex Ovechkin and Johnny Wayne.  And the Froot of the Looms guys.

Oh yeah, and then there was this ad.  Nice.

The Hall of Fame contains murderers, thugs, and other generally nasty people.  No gamblers, though.  Professionals have standards.

Oh yeah, and he was tossed out of baseball because he was gambling on baseball games while managing.  That's a paddling.

No, no!  You got iy all wrong!  I didn't bet on the Undertaker!  Honest, Mr. Kane, sir!  Honest!

Oh yeah, and he had a stint in the WWE.  I don't think he reached 4,000 hits there, though.

Well, that sucks.

Oh yeah, and he was convicted of tax evasion in 1990.  Oops.

Moving on.

LANA DEL REY

I just don't get it.  So, like, you make yourself a fake name, Lana Del Rey.  That's fine.  Lotsa people have fake names.

If you look up "Nepotism" in the dictionary...

Fake name.  Fine.  Whatever.  But then your website boldly proclaims "Debut album Born To Die out January 30".  Well, you already had an album out in 2010, only it was under your real name.  I suppose that's sorta like saying that it's the debut album for...

There's a little emo in all of us.

.., but it's not like Lizzy Grant was a different persona from what you're exuding now.  And just what are you exuding now, anyway?

Uh huh.

Mmhmm.

Yup.

Alright, I've seen enough.

You know, patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel, so they say.  I think that that point is being proven here in spades.  And stars.  And stripes.  I dunno, maybe it's just cause I'm Canadian and fond of red-heads that it kinda makes me wanna gag all this phoney b.s.  My God, it's like she's sold out before she's even been put on the shelf.

Now, she can sing.  Oh yes, she can sing, but the songs are all just about crap, too.  "I love my bad ass boyfriend, etc."  Come on....  That's such crap.  That's like she's a modern day Loretta Lynnn singing "Stand By Your Man".  Nonsense.  Crap.  Actually, I can do better.  Ahem.

CRAAAAAAP!

And on that note, that's all I can stomach for one post.  Thank you again for tuning in and have a good night.  Random Word Wednesday will be back with a vengeance, but until then the editorial board here at Raccoon Inc. advises you to take care, stay warm, and don't take any wooden nickles.