Friday, 3 November 2017

A Wolf in Nerd's Clothing

Good afternoon.

Straight off the the starting gun today, I'll make this formal declaration.

I AM A NERD.

Probably not a shocking declaration, but there it is.  I love many nerdy things!

Anime, for example.

Its absurdity.
Its thoughtfulness.
Its creativity.
I love jazz.
Its absurdity.
Its thoughtfulness.
Its creativity.
I love lots of other nerdy things, too!

Baseball statistics!
Foreign comedies!
Grand strategy games!
Indie rock!
And so on.

So, I get nerds and I love nerdy stuff.  I have the nerd gene.  I get why one would be a nerd and why nerding isn't for everyone, and that's fine.  I have a concern, though.  It's a growing concern that just keeps seeming to get a slight bit worse daily.  I started noticing it maybe a couple years ago but it's growing, baby.  What is it?  Why, it's...

NEEEEEEERD RAAAAAAAAGE!!!!

 I don't mean the normal, garden variety...

...nerd rage.
I mean this absolute nonsense right here:

Ta da!
This is Gavin McInnes.  You may have seen him around.  More on him in a bit.  Some anecdotal stuff first.

I have been noticing the slow steady slide of some friends of mine towards opinions such as anti-Islam, anti-immigration, anti-transgender, anti-feminism. anti-fat, pro-white. anti-tax, etc. Demonstrably so.  Disconcertingly so.  It's scary.  It's sad.

I ask myself, do I fight back against this slide towards really hateful things?  Do I use my massive soapbox platform of precisely...
...Zero...
...subscribers to fight back against the tide?

Sure.  Why not?

O.k. like and but so Gavin McInnes.

This guy right here.
Note.  Cheap collared white short-sleeved shirt.  Multiple coloured pens.  Pocket protector (!).  Lame tie.  Please note all of these things.

That is not what this man looks like, you see.  He looks like this:

Hipster.
More hipster.
Peak hipster.
In fact, clothes do make the man.

Pundit Gavin.
Yosemite Gavin.
The Gavin.
Trans Gavin.
Badass Gavin.
Daddy Gavin.
And
so
on.
As one who makes videos and presents evocative imagery, the way he presents himself is part of the message.  Intended to shock, mock or otherwise, he understands that appearance is everything in this medium.  So, I have to ask.

What's up with this?
If one does a Google search for pocket protectors, one will find images like this:

Uh huh.
Mmhmm.
Sure.
Nerds.

Nerds everywhere.

Ostensibly missing in his other pictures are pocket protectors.  There are none in his hipster costumes, none stuffed in his brassiere, nor any in amongst his lovely fur stole.  Just only for...

Get Off My Lawn.
Why?

The opening blurb for the channel has this to say about it:

Mmhmm.  $99/year?  $10/mo.?  HOW COULD I AFFORD NOT TO?!
"Off-kilter humor".  Where have I heard that line before?
The WHOLE TRUTH.
Oh yes!  Kevin J.!  I wonder how he's doing these days.

Still cranking out the hits!
Trying to sell racism, sexism, jingoism, sizism, homophobia, as ridiculous racism, side-splitting sexism, jolly jingoism, silly sizism, hilarious homophobia doesn't elevate it and make it acceptable. Further, you're striking a blow against "liberal victim culture"?  With what?

Illiberal victim culture?
Why send this message to nerds, geeks and squares?  Are you trying to play off of our insecurities, maybe?  Are you trying to maybe say that our problems in life aren't us, it's them?  Are you trying to dress up like a nerd to say hey, I'm one of you, too, and I understand and appreciate your problems because they're my problems, too?  Are you trying to stoke nerd rage?

I say all this, because everywhere I look I find ads for this stupid Get Off My Lawn popping up, and I see my insecure friends falling for this absolute garbage, day after day.  I mean, shame on them for falling for it, but dude, shame on you for dressing up as a nerd and then preying upon these poor slobs!

Also, as I say about...

...his ridiculous costumes...
...the man was born in England, grew up in Ottawa, graduated from Concordia University, and then subsequently left Canada for...

NEW YORK CITY?!
Quote, Mr. McInnis in 2003:

"I don't want our culture diluted. We need to close the borders now and let everyone assimilate to a Western, English-speaking way of life."

Right.

Mr. McInnes,

I have absolutely no idea what your "our culture" that you're trying to sell me even means.  It's all just a fraud.  You're a New York City con man, dude.  You're out to make a fast (American) buck off of me and my fellow nerds.  We know, we know, you would be ever so happy to show us how we can donate, support, kickstart, gofund, subscribe, merch, or otherwise transfer our hard-earned wealth into your deep (unprotected) pockets so that you may purchase another costume and explain to us better how "our culture" is under attack from some new and dangerous yet vague, non-libelous thing. You have no patent on "our culture" whatsoever. None.

I was born in Saskatchewan, raised in Saskatchewan, I live in Saskatchewan.  Provided it yet exists at the time of my death, I hope to die in Saskatchewan.  If my culture is under attack, it is not from some nebulous, nonsensical boogey-man that you and your pals are trying to trump (Trump?) up and sell to us for a price (in American funds).  It is you, sir. You are leading the charge against the common nerd.  You are the wolf in nerd's clothing. You're not with us, you mock us.  You may take your pocket protector and shove it right up your New York ass!  Find another getup to adorn yourself with to better patronize-while-begging-for-(American-)cash somewhere else.  Better yet, go find yet another country, move there and tell them what their values are supposed to be.  Then you can close the borders.

Sincerely,

The Editorial Board of Raccoon Inc.

P.S.  Thank you for reading and good night.

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