In Defense of the Omar Khadr Settlement and Do You Need a Fat Friend?

Good day.

The Editorial Board here at the downtown offices of Raccoon Inc...

That's us there across the street from the Police Dept.  Nice view of the stadium from the office.  $3,000 well spent!

...would like to say a few words concerning the Omar Khadr settlement which has been breathlessly reported over the past month.  The settlement came out to $10.5 million, plus an apology for the Guantanamo Bay detainment, to be paid out by the federal government in order to avoid trial.

A number of voices out there have made manifest their displeasure with this agreement.  Opposition Leader Andrew Scheer, former Prime Minister Stephen Harper, and a whole host of pundits across the spectrum have come out against the deal.  It has even been called treasonous by more than a few. But let's now take a look and see for ourselves.  Was the Omar Khadr Settlement a good thing?

The aggrieved.

Tabitha Speer, the widow of the late U.S. Sergeant First Class Christopher Speer whom Khadr was convicted of killing in an American military court, and U.S. Sergeant First Class Layne Morris would disagree.  It was, by the way, SFC Morris who believed that Justin Trudeau should be charged with treason.

Mrs. Speer, for her part, is attempting to freeze the payment to Khadr on the grounds that, well, she's the widow after all.  Well, as of a couple hours ago, that move was dismissed by the judge.
The reason for the freeze is that she had won a wrongful death suit of her own in the state of Utah to the tune of $134 million dollars.  However, since Omar is a Canadian citizen, and not an American one, the claim was never enforced, so she has effectively won a completely noncollectable $134,000,000.00 judgement.

As for Sgt. Morris, "treason" is an interesting word to throw around, but not a correct one.  Treason, as defined by the United States, applies to American citizens and consists of only two acts: committing an act of war against the United States and giving aid to aid and comfort to the enemies of the United States. Well, golly. How does one define an "enemy", anyhow?

Well, I suppose that's one way.

The United Nations defines a "child soldier" as follows:

"A child associated with an armed force or armed group refers to any person below 18 years of age who is, or who has been, recruited or used by an armed force or armed group in any capacity, including but not limited to children, boys and girls, used as fighters, cooks, porters, spies or for sexual purposes."

Mr. Khadr was freshly fifteen years old at the time the fighting had reached the place where Khadr living in Afghanistan.  Reading the description of the whole event as it is described, it sounded like it was a hell of a battle.  Grenades, bombs, live fire being exchanged, piles of dead, smoke everywhere. A...

...warzone...

...doesn't sound like any place a 15-year-old should be, but there it is.  What was he doing at an old Soviet compound, anyway?

Omar's father Ahmed Khadr was a very interesting man.  His life's story reads like...

...a John le Carré novel..,

...working for the U.N. one moment, al-Qaeda the next.  Again, fascinating stuff.  At any rate, while staying with his family in NW Pakistan, Ahmad "allowed" his son to leave home and go hang out with Abu Laith al-Libi, an al-Qaeda boss.

Yeah, probably not.

From what's been shown, Omar wasn't really much more than a servant at the compound, pretty well exactly the definition of a child soldier shown earlier.  It was demonstrable that he had received weapons training only just previous to his encounter with the American military machine, but it was very much less demonstrable that he had actually participated in any active way during the fighting. Omar Khadr's confession was coerced under extreme duress for a 15-16 year old that had been blown up, shot in the back twice, denied surgery to repair his eyesight as an interrogation technique, and held in inhumane conditions.  And then he was transferred to...

...Guantanamo.

Then he was plopped in front of...

...American Military Tribunals...

...where he plead guilty to murder and attempted murder on flimsy evidence that would never have held up in an actual criminal court.  Did anyone actually see him throw the grenade?  Nope.  Was he the only survivor?  Nope.  The whole proprietorial case was a fraud, and the guilty plea was more resignation after eight years in Guantanamo under torture and extreme conditions than it was an admission.  Before Omar Khadr, no child soldier had been prosecuted for a war crime since World War II.  The Americans wanted him, and after they made an agreement with Canada for repatriation, they only agreed if Omar served another year in an American jail.  Just because. I tell you what, folks.  This stuff was not NCIS.

In the lead up to Omar's repatriation, the Supreme Court came to a unanimous 9-0 decision that, holy cow, did they ever violate his basic rights and freedoms as granted by the Constitution while he was...

..."interrogated"...

...at Guantanamo Bay.  This, then, is the basis Omar's $20,000,000 lawsuit against the Canadian government.  Canadian officials sat idly by, present while Omar was being tortured attempting to extract a coerced confession to murder and attempted murder charges based on spurious evidence that would have been laughed out of a criminal court.  Can't blame the man for trying.

So, the government settled with Omar for $10,500,000.  Why?  Well, they could try and fight it, but they'd be fighting uphill against a unanimous Supreme Court of Canada decision that went the other way. Plus there would be public testimony that would not look very pretty when the public caught on how the sausage was being made.  The government could be excused for not wanting to fight the good fight here.

Another thing to consider is that this whole process had been going on a long time.  There would be...

...quite...

...a few...

...hands in...

...the cookie jar.

Not to mention...

...former and current Justice Ministers..,

...former and current Public Safety Ministers...,

...former and current Defense Ministers..,

...and former and current Foreign Affairs Ministers..,

...and former and current Canadian Ambassadors to the United States..,

...and their deputies, and their staffers, and the bureaucrats, and so on ad infinitum.  What do each and everyone of these people need should the Omar Khadr suit go to trial?

Lawyers.

How are lawyers remunerated?

Images of old Scotsmen.  Many, many images of old Scotsmen.

Whose old Scotsmen?

If you're not sure, ask them.  They'd know.

So, had Khadr gone to trial, there is the very real risk that he would not only receive the $10,000,000, but we would also need to, you know, pay for the trial.  A trial covering fifteen years worth of ugly history.  That could also last years.  He could also receive the full $20,000,000.  Possibly more.  The price tag to the good old fashioned Canadian Taxpayer could be...

Just so.

So!  Is, or was, Omar Khadr a terrorist?  An enemy combatant?  I have reasonable doubt.  Was he tortured and treated in ways that we as a civilized society have agreed that our citizens ought not be treated?  Without a doubt.  Is there a worse imaginable scenario than this?  Without a doubt.  So let's just maybe can the hysterics and take our bitter medicine as a nation with some dignity.


BONUS ROUND

Yo!  Are you fat?

Yeah, I know.  That question gets to be a little bit of...

Precisely.

But why is it a tricky subject?  Well, bluntly, because it ain't easy out there for fat people.  I should know.  I've never been small.  I've always been picked last for sports teams, broken lawn chairs, looked very disapprovingly at my body, treadmilled, not treadmilled, and oh boy, do I dread flying. But you know who else dreads flying?

Et voila!

Your Fat Friend does.  Who is Your Fat Friend?  A freaking angel!  Not, like, an...

...Angel..,

...nor even an...

...angel..,

...but a...

...bad ass, kick ass, shredding rock angel!

Why?  Because she gets it.  She understands what it's like to be fat.  Not only that, but she devotes her life to spreading the fat gospel so that others understand, too.  Furthermore, when you're having one of those moments where you feel alone, neglected, or disgusted by your size, she's there to tell you you're awesome, and she damn well means it, too.  She asks questions occasionally intended not just for her own curiosity, but to stimulate honest discussion and understanding.  She is a lovely, lovely person, and she makes a difference every day and she deserves props.

So, I know nobody reads this, but in the unlikely event that someone, you know...

...gets lost and finds us...

...we invite you to make a new Fat Friend.  You can find her many ways!  Her blog, her email address, she's @yrfatfriend on Twitter (which, by the way is THE BEST pick-me-up ever when you're feeling like crap about yourself - even the trolls are reaffirming!), oh and Patreon, too, so please support!

And that is it for today!  Thank you very much for reading!












































Are we clear?  Cool.  Well!  Gee, I think we did really good here today.  How many subscribers are we up to now?

Ah ha.  I see.  Good, good, good.  Nowhere to go but up from here.  Let me just check my comments here...

Well, I mean, what more needs to be said, really?  How can you improve upon perfection?
Possible title for next post:

RACCOON INC. SILENCES CRITICS

Boffo!  Man.  Almost five years this has been going on now.  Crazy.  I've still got it!  Let's see how many views the last post got...

I think they were both me...  Hmm.  Well, whatever.  I like me.  Anyway, suppertime.  More soapboxing later.  Good night!

Warmbier, Victim Blaming, and the Not-So-Small Screen

Good day.

We here at Raccoon Inc. would like to say a word of apology for not posting anything for years.  A situation has arisen, however, that must be addressed.  That situation is this:

We looked around // and then we found // the man for you and me!

Granted, it's not a new or even that emergent of a situation, but rather one that I think people need reminding of.  Not the movie, either, mind you.  The movie was great!  Still in my top five all time.  No, what I'd like to cast your attention to is a very sharp comment by Mr. Hitler.

"If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed."

And he should know!  The man was a master manipulator, and he was not wrong in this regard.  If you have a lie and it's big enough and you say it enough, it will indeed get drilled into everyone's head.  This sort of back and forth, nebulous grip that we have on the "truth" was highlighted thematically very recently in the third season of FX's show Fargo.

Perception of reality becomes reality.

See?  Whether or not something is complete bull doesn't matter as long as you believe it is true, and this is where we get to the meat of what we here at Raccoon Inc.'s editorial board would like to get at. Presenting: the late Mr. Otto Warmbier.

There's a cool shot of the young man.

This is the young gentleman who went on a New Years (2016) vacation to North Korea, was ostensibly charged with theft for stealing a propaganda poster, tried and sentenced to fifteen (15!) years hard labour. After a year, North Korea released him back to the United States in a come where he died roughly a week later after it was found that he had received significant neurological damage due to indeterminate causes. Here are the pictures that were released by North Korea of the trial.

Uh huh.

Mmhmm.

Gotcha.

As for proof that he actually stole the poster, the North Koreans offer this hard hitting evidence.

In flagrante delicto!

Cameras don't lie, right?  Clearly, we've caught our criminal mastermind.

Eat your heart out, Varga.

So at this point, I'd just like to say that this is all nonsense.  Complete and utter nonsense.  Garbage. Please, bear in mind that the information that you're receiving here, the "evidence", comes from a show trial.  For greater emphasis:

A COMMUNIST SHOW TRIAL

It's a show trial.  It's designed to be shown to the people.  You mess with the boss and this is what you get, right?  The actual guilt?  The actual crime?  Confessions are forced.  Charges are fabricated. Evidence is likewise created.

Everything's made up and the points don't matter.

It's all second to the pageantry.  The American kid cried on the stand and said that he wanted to take the poster back to his church as a trophy.  Is there are more perfect picture that they could have painted than this one?  Parading an American kid in front of the cameras for a bit "trial" will show the rest of the DPRK two very important things.  One is that while those Americans think they are so big and tough, they can't just walk in here and do what they want while they're in our house.  Two is that if a rich American kid can't get away with stealing such a paltry thing as a poster, no one can.  No one is above the law.  No one.  And for a church yet!

Bosh!  Flimshaw!

The original claim was that Otto had "carried out a hostile act against the DRPK".  Is there any veracity to that at all?  Well, this is from the same people who claimed that Kim Jong Il shot a 38 under par at the Pyongyang Golf Club.  Would you believe that?

You have selected "No".

We could go on about the outrageous claims that the DPRK or any other totalitarian regime has made, but the point is that when you control the message, you control the truth.  Did Otto steal or do anything at all? Who knows, but I wouldn't believe anything the DPRK had to say about it.  The truth of the matter is that the DPRK always likes to have a few American hostages on hand in case of emergency.  It's a good insurance policy.  He didn't have to steal anything or do anything.  He may just have had his number drawn.  It's that simple.  So no one's actually going to believe that he stole anything, are they?

"Is it wrong of me to think that Otto Warmbier got exactly what he deserved?  I see him crying at his sentencing hearing and think, 'What did you expect?"     
- (Now Former) University of Delaware Professor Katherine Detwyler

"North Korea Proves Your White Male Privilege is Not Universal"
- Huffington Post Headline

"Why Do People Blame Otto Warmbier For His North Korea Sentence? Privilege Can Sometimes Come At A Price"
- Bustle Headline

And we could go on, but you get the drift.  The idea is that he earned his fate because karma.  Rich white kid pokes the bear and gets mauled.  

This is total nonsense.  There is this idea that he somehow poked the bear, and to believe that you have to believe that he attempted to swipe a poster, which, I say, is nonsense.  When you go back to the whole question of what truth is, it's completely counter-productive to believe anything that North Korea says because it's whole existence is predicated upon lies.  It is a creature that must lie in order to survive, and if we believe them, the joke's on us.  Instead, we must look coolly at the facts.  An American kid bought a tour to North Korea, the kid was arrested attempting to leave the country, the kid was tortured, and North Korea spit him back out just in time to ensure that the kid's death was not on their soil.

And that's about it.  Any attempts to shoehorn privilege or victim blaming is really just an attempt to grab edgy headlines and ultimately should be ignored.

Please, stick to reputable sources.

BONUS ROUND

Oh, and one last little non-sequitur here today before we call it a wrap.  (I'm gonna call these little ending side-notes the BONUS ROUND from now on.  Seems catchy.  Games still have bonus rounds, right?)  Back to the subject of David Thewlis.

Merry Christmas

In Season 3 of the FX show Fargo, David Thewlis played a wonderfully slimy villain and it was a sort of creepy kind of joy to see the actor open up the valve and convey an almost omnipotent brand of menace. Damn.  Fine.  Work.  Now contrast Varga with this:

And a Happy Remembrance Day

Thewlis' Ares in Wonder Woman was flat, boring, lazy and hollow compared to the gleefully villainous Varga to the point where it's almost a waste to plug him in there and hope that something good happens. In fact, the thought that crossed my mind is, why am I even watching movies anymore?

It's not just Thewlis, either.  There are a host of good examples of brilliant television performances that turn to stone in blockbusters.

Is it better here...

...or here?

Number one...

...or number two?

Is it clearer now...

...or now?

How about A...

...or B?

I could go on all day like this, but the amount of money and time I spend on great big theatre going movies is decreasing steadily when there is a just plain better product available in my living room at no extra charge.

And that's all the time we have for today.  Thank you very much for reading and have a wonderful day!